November 09, 2003
What Round Is This Anyway?
The headline is "Pam wants to talk chicken but KFC won’t bite"
Good for KFC. Pamela Anderson as a chicken expert? Please!
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“Pam Anderson has been trying to meet with Novak because she cares passionately about the well-being of chickens,” says a source. “Pam objects to things like how KFC scalds live chickens to de-feather them, but Novak won’t even take her calls.” Now, Anderson, an active member of People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, will call for a boycott of KFC on her weekly radio show.
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Because of the stalemate, says the source, PETA is stepping up its war with KFC. “If they won’t meet with us, we’re taking our case to the children.” The source says that PETA will start handing out what they’re calling “Buckets of Blood” in front KFC outlets across the country. “They’ll look like KFC’s buckets of chicken, and will contain things like mutilated, gory chickens,” says the source. “We gave kids ‘Unhappy Meals’ at McDonald’s and Burger King crowns with animals impaled on the points when they wouldn’t meet with us. After those kids started screaming, both McDonald’s and Burger King got reasonable.”
I can't wait for the pictures.
hln
Posted by hln at November 9, 2003 07:10 PM | PETA! | TrackBack
Mmmm...the only thing better than chicken is bread.
Posted by: Sophorist at November 9, 2003 08:19 PMThat should be an entertaining multi-billion dollar emotional trauma class action lawsuit.
Posted by: Aaron at November 10, 2003 02:10 AMIf those were my kids, nieces, friends, or just some cute kid, those buckets of chicken would be taken and dumped on top of those people - and in their cars, and then I'd find their homes and put dead fish in them.
That, or I'd hold a chicken party outside of KFC.
Posted by: TheYeti at November 10, 2003 02:49 PMIf those were my kids, nieces, friends, or just some cute kid, those buckets of chicken would be taken and dumped on top of those people - and in their cars, and then I'd find their homes and put dead fish in them.
That, or I'd hold a chicken party outside of KFC. Or bring a hose in 30 degree weather.
Posted by: TheYeti at November 10, 2003 02:49 PMIf those were my kids, nieces, friends, or just some cute kid, those buckets of chicken would be taken and dumped on top of those people - and in their cars, and then I'd find their homes and put dead fish in them.
That, or I'd hold a chicken party outside of KFC. Or bring a hose in 30 degree weather.
Posted by: TheYeti at November 10, 2003 02:51 PMI think he feels strongly. If I ever encounter one of these, I imagine I'll take the idea and run with it.
I'm certainly not afraid of chicken guts. Five years' experience should lend itself to some sort of PETA thwarting.
Let the flinging begin.
hln
Posted by: hln at November 10, 2003 03:00 PM